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Book Summaries Psychology

Law 16: See the Hostility Behind the Friendly Facade (The Laws of Human Nature)

The Law of Aggression

We are all aggressive, and to try to deny this part of human nature is unwise. We act surprised when we see aggressive acts being committed on the news, as if this urge was alien to us. And yet, countless games about killing others are always being manufactured, and it is these games that are the most popular. The same can be said about movies and series.

There are three ways in which aggression can manifest itself.

1) Controlled aggression: This is the productive kind. We are in control over our anger and know how to channel it correctly.

2) Passive aggression: The bad kind. We let our anger out in ways that are outside our control.   

3) Internal aggression: The worst kind. We blame ourselves excessively and punish ourselves for our past.

John D. Rockefeller monopolized the oil industry through his relentless aggression. While he was smart and knowledgeable, it was not these traits that propelled a man that had a humble background to dominate the business world so blatantly. It was his sheer determination to wipe out all competition. He went on the offensive – buying out the companies of of his competitors’ businesses whenever he could. And he used the legal system and any other means at his disposal – ethical or otherwise – to get what we wanted. But he was calm, he seemed mild-mannered, even weak to others. But this was because he knew how to conceal his aggression well.

The weak are the ones are those who do not know how to conceal and control their aggression. They bottle up their emotions and then have a sudden emotional outburst. After this affair, they resort back to their old self-sabotaging ways. They become complacent and bitter and then the cycle repeats.

Find ways to channel your aggression appropriately. You must remember to be patient. Any success you have will happen because you refuse to give up. The more difficult the task becomes, the more you should push to find new ways.

Hannibal, “I will find a way, or I will create one”

If you can channel your aggression towards your work, use it productively and not damage relationships with other people, or weaken yourself, then aggression – a part of your shadow – can be integrated successfully into your character, and help you fulfil your potential.

Read The Laws of Human Nature

"A gilded No is more satisfactory than a dry yes" - Gracian

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