In Cairo Aly bumped into [the singer] Juliette Greco again. He asked her to dance. • “You have too bad a reputation,” she replied. “We’re going to sit very much apart.” – • “What are you doing tomorrow?” he insisted. • “Tomorrow I take a plane to Beirut.” • When she boarded the plane, Aly was already on it, grinning at her surprise…. • Dressed in tight black leather slacks and a black sweater [Greco] stretched languorously in an armchair of her Paris house and observed: • “They say I am a dangerous woman. Well, Aly was a dangerous man. He was charming in a very special way. There is a kind of man who is very clever with women. He takes you out to a restaurant and if the most beautiful woman comes in, he doesn’t look at her. He makes you feel you are a queen. Of course, I understood it. I didn’t believe it. I would laugh and point out the beautiful woman. But that is me…. Most women are made very happy by that kind of attention. It’s pure vanity. She thinks, ‘I’ll be the one and the others will leave.’ • ”. . . With Aly, how the woman felt was most important…. He was a great charmer, a great seducer. He made you feel fine and that everything was easy. No problems. Nothing to worry about. Or regret. It was always, ‘What can I do for you? What do you need?’ Airplane tickets, cars, boats; you felt you were on a pink cloud. “
LEONARD SLATER, ALY:A BIOGRAPHY
Aly Khan was not very handsome, and his wealth was offset by his bad reputation – these did not make him a great seducer. It was his strategies that did. He isolated his victims, working slowly and subtly that they did not notice it. He gave a woman intense attention, and this made her feel that in that moment, in his eyes, she was the only woman in the world. Khan always took his woman to an enchanted place somewhere in the world that he knew well, but where she felt lost.
Like Aly, you should not give your target the chance to worry about or resist you. Flood them with attention. People secretly want to be led astray by someone who is more confident than they are. To let go can be a pleasure – even if it makes you feel weak and isolated, if done gracefully and gradually.
Put them in a spot where they have no place to go, and they will die before fleeing.
—SUN-TZU
People around you may seem strong and in control, but that is a façade. They envelop themselves in safety nets – friends, families, routines, and these give them a sense of security and predictability. Pull the rug from under the suddenly, take them outside their comfort zone, and you will see a different person.
If you’re interested in exploring the darker parts of human psychology that most people ignore, consider reading this short book The Dichotomy of the Self.